Hey Not A Model, Tell Me Where Have You Been?

Let's talk balance. 

I'm currently working on finding a sense of steadiness in my work life, social life, city life, suburb life, love life and writing life.

I started a new job a couple of weeks ago and I'm still getting used to my new routine. While I'm enjoying the new opportunity, the division between commuting, early mornings, skyscrapers, subways, home-cooked meals, events, dates and late night everything has taken its toll.

I know I haven't given my all to Not A Model lately and it does not leave a good taste in my mouth.

After a long day of work at a desk, I find it difficult to come home and sit at a computer and write something inspiring. However, when I see my posts becoming less and less frequent, I feel guilty.

I'm trying to keep it all together. I'm trying to schedule every important person and event in my life, while trying to remember to keep my sanity.

On Friday, I debated skipping a party I was invited to. It was the 1 year anniversary of the photography studio Hermann & Audrey. How could I say no to Stefania? If you read this blog regularly, you can see her photography everywhere (*ahem logo) and I always support the other photographers (Cory, Steve, Javier, Jalani) and I enjoy their events.

So I sucked it up.

I went to work during the day in the city, went back home to the suburbs, swiped some liquid liner on my lids, zipped up my knee high boots, grabbed a friend and drove back to the city at night. Was I exhausted? Sure. Was I happy I went? Most definitely. Besides, aren't Saturdays for sleeping in?

 [Me marveling at Javier Lovera's beautiful photography - credit: Kristina Dhillon]

"In today's society we sometimes forget to balance our hearts and our heads; this is the reason we stop laughing." -Yakov Smirnoff

Lately, my laughter isn't as frequent, but I know I'm just finding my way like everyone else.

Writing is my passion. I love my readers and I still have so much left to say, capture, write and share. It won't always be perfect, but I want to keep this going for as long as it makes me happy.

My heart lies with a pen and a message. Hope you're still listening.

Stuck in Suburbia

Regression |riˈgre sh ən|

noun

• a return to an earlier stage of life or a supposed previous life

Living away from home as a student for the past four years was a significant time in my life. I learned independence, self reliance, and enjoyed my little taste of freedom. Currently, my housemates go by Mom, Pops and little sis. 

The Good
Home cooked meals- My parents are great cooks. Maybe it’s because we’re Italian. All I know is my old diet of rice and vegetables does not beat coming home after a long day to a healthy, complete meal with all the trimmings.
The amenities- I live rent free with internet, phone, cable, groceries and laundry included. If something breaks down, it doesn’t take a week to fix. I’m never freezing, or sweating or living with dust bunnies.
Warm and Fuzzies- I come home to that cozy, homey, welcoming atmosphere that only your original home has. Maybe it’s the smell. Maybe it’s my Mom forcing me to hug her while I protest. Home is just home.

The Bad
I can’t find a single thing- when you live with friends, no one touches your stuff.  In my house, my clothes are constantly under my sister’s bed, or in her car. My mom moves EVERYTHING. Anything left on a counter space is fair game to be moved to an obscure location never to be found again!
Lights out- Not like a curfew or anything, but my family gets to bed at an early hour. The house just shuts down. In university, there is always someone to talk to, eat with, drag out, or gossip with at all hours of the night!
Killing the Environment- You have to drive everywhere. Oh suburbia. How boring art thou. People do not come outside unless to walk their dogs. Sadly, I now use my puppy as an excuse to go for a walk. I nod, half smile and discuss the weather with my other suburban pet owners.
The Riddler- There is a constant inquisition into my life. “Where are you going? Who are you going with? What do you want for dinner? What time are you coming home? Do you have a key? What are your plans for tomorrow? This does not go over well early in the morning. BEWARE!

The Compromise
Right now home works for me. With my busy schedule, and heavy workload, it is nice to have people who care so much about my well being. I am very grateful to whoever puts up with my grumpy pants in the morning. So Monday to Friday living at home is great. However, when the weekend comes around, I yearn to live with people my age and be two steps away from the downtown action. I do miss city life, even small town city life.

But I know those days will come again. For now I’ll have to settle for homemade pasta sauce and never being able to find my stuff.