Spy Girl

When searching for the first place of my own, I didn't care about square footage, or building amenities, I wanted a balcony.

My current view doesn't sweep across the geometric Toronto skyline, and it doesn't stare at a body of water, or a wild forest. Instead, it faces a narrow alleyway where I can see a sign for a dental office, and a dry cleaner. Adjacent to me are two apartment buildings.

I can see inside other people's lives, while they watch The Toronto Maple Leafs lose win play another hockey game, or as they step outside to smoke a cigarette. I can see people shaking their sheets to make their bed. My view has an Alfred Hitchcock Rear Window kind of feel, minus murder, binoculars and Grace Kelly. I'm not trying to pry, it's just right there.

When I was a kid my hero was Harriet the Spy.

She was always writing things down with her scratchy pencil in her black and white notebook. She observed the world in her own way. She was brave. While Harriet got busted by her friends when they found her notebook, I know better than to have my personal thoughts lying on my kitchen table. Instead, I have password protected word documents. While I do have this blog, I am a very private person. Even after five years of writing, I still struggle with sharing my thoughts and photos publicly.

While I'm not a professional spy, I sometimes dress like one. I also write to figure out my small place in the world. As my favourite writer Joan Didion once said, “I write entirely to find out what I'm thinking, what I'm looking at, what I see and what it means. What I want and what I fear.”

I don't know if I'll ever stop.

Photo credits: Stefania Sgambelluri

The Sip

Earlier this week, Stef and I wanted to go for post-work drinks, but instead of knocking ourselves over with cocktails, we decided to fuel our bods with smoothies and fresh juice. We checked out Bolt Fresh Bar on Queen West in Toronto. Bolt has plenty of healthy options to choose from, including juices, smoothies, grain bowls and salads. We chose a Greena Colada and Spicy Citrus juice and started the week off on a healthier note. I wore my favourite sweater and scarf from my favourite store, Madewell, and my new cherished J.Crew necklace that I received as a gift over the weekend. Can you believe we still have to wear a scarf at the end of April?

If you're looking for a healthy weeknight option, Bolt is located at 1170 Queen St. West. I mean, who wants to head into the office hungover? Below are the photos that Stef took on our walk back. Enjoy!

The Sweater Diaries

I stole a bunch of my father's old sweaters.

The steal was quite easy, as I don't think he's touched these sweaters since the nineties. I shook the dust off, and took them back to my city closet.

I worked with them. I belted a soft, black velvety one and wore it to work on casual Friday. I cut a large dark green one into a crop knit. Despite alterations, the only find that never needed an adjustment was an oversized cream-coloured crew neck sweater. Wearing it feels like being cocooned in a blanket, except while being fully dressed and not sitting on the couch watching Netflix.

My best friend Stef told me that I need to embrace a more undone look. Since 90s grunge is making a fashion comeback, I understood her sentiment. The shoot brings with it two-day old blow-out hair, where my corkscrews are fighting to get back to their natural state. They never like being pulled straight anyways.

Photos by Stefania Sgambelluri also known as the queen of Dr. Martens and leather backpacks; jeans are Madewell's Skinny Skinny.

And then there's the sweater.

Mellow Yellow

When trapped in one's own mind, the best cure is to go outside.

Let the sunshine tickle your ankles. Let the warm breeze lick your face. Let the scent of freshly cut grass smack you in the forehead. Shake some ice cubes around. Listen to the sound. Sluuuuurp anything through a straw. Ride a bike. Pet a dog. Phone a friend to meet you in the park. People watch. Put on a cap and go for a jog. Slick some colour on your lips, cheeks or eyelids. Laugh. Move. Relax.

Forget why you felt trapped in the first place.

These are all the signs of a mellow season, or the road to a better self. I've been working on becoming my better self. Lately, no matter how I am feeling, it seems that the cure is always outside. There are the big decisions (more on that to come) and there are the small decisions; the easy ones. The ones that involve enjoying the small elements of a big world.

Below are some photos Stef took when I phoned a friend (her) and we spent the day hanging around our local park. My hair is also a bit more yellow, if you haven't noticed. (Shirt: Madewell, Sunglasses, Joe Fresh)

Enjoy! x

Everyday Beauty - Ali

I originally met Ali when I was volunteering at the PR agency she works at. Since then I've run into her at beauty events and recently noticed on social media that she was into making jewelry.

By making jewelry I don't mean tying beads on a string (not that there is anything wrong with that) but she was into casting, polishing and blowtorch melting her own creations. It all started when she noticed a gap in the Canadian shopping market. She wanted to buy quality jewelry (aka not $6, and won't break or rust) but she also didn't want to spend a fortune. This sparked her to take a local jewelry making class to see if she could make her own. And she could. That one class turned into courses and she now rents out a studio with other artists in Toronto to make her line.

Despite being the long-lost sister of Olivia Wilde (Am I right?!) Ali's beauty does not just rest in her celery-hued eyes or incandescent skin, although it is quite distracting. That is only the surface.

She has a strong sense of self. She's calm and passionate about her work and her life. She works hard, long hours (I know as we share the same industry) but still uses her extra time (as if anyone has any of that) to work on her designs. She even created a wedding ring for a couple in Australia. Her jewelry is classic, beautiful and has that extra bit of care, exactly like her.

I love meeting people who are interested in making new things, solving problems and living creatively. It's the real secret to beauty, I believe.

To check out Ali's creations and get in touch with her, click here, here and here. x

Blue Days

I seem to put a lot of pressure on myself these days. I beat myself up the way an adamant chef pounds a raw chicken breast until the piece is translucent, weak and ready.

Ready to be dredged in breadcrumbs. Ready for the touch of a sizzling pan. The hot spit crackle. There is always the preparation.

Perhaps being tough on yourself is a sign that a change must occur. It could be a reason to think about thought patterns and growth. Maybe it's a way to push through to honesty, or a reminder that things aren't right.

Or maybe it's a sign to lighten up a bit. To enjoy the present. To embrace the stage of life, even if it feels off. And so if I couldn't lighten up, I decided to brighten up.

When the sun drenched the city, I wore my brightest coat to meet my best friend for coffee. As we walked, she commented that I strangely matched the construction beams on the street.

Yes, I thought, we're both a work in progress.

photo credit: stefania sgams

Confetti & Coffee Shops

I first met Dallas when I was a nervous, witless freshman during my first week of university.

She was a soph (translation: leader of witless freshman for the largest Frosh Week in Canada) and while she wasn't assigned to me, she was kind enough to chat me up when she saw me confused, or sitting in a large group probably nervously fussing with my hair.

I remember her telling me that she was heading to Africa on an internship that the media program I was about to embark upon, supported. I was away from home for the first time, and this cool girl with the coolest name was leaping off to Africa, while I felt that moving two hours away from home was a huge deal.

I stumbled upon her original blog (before blogging was even a thing) and was excited to read about someone I admired who seemed to have it all together, four years ahead of me (note: best friend husband, creative career, a life in different cities).

We kept in touch via reading about each other's blog adventures and the occasional email. I was delighted when she asked me to be in one of her portrait sessions when she was visiting over the holiday break. We went for coffee before the shoot and she once again gave me just the right dose of life advice to shake me back to something better.

We threw around colourful paper confetti like we were making a Pinterest board despite the rainy, frigid weather and my nerves dissipated. Did I mention she is also a self-taught make-up artist?

Below are photos from the shoot, but head over to her site for the rest of the photos and a fun .GIF she created. Also, stop by her full blog for lovely photography and daily inspiration. You won't regret it!

x

 

Skirt & Top - J.Crew | Jacket Mango | Boots H&M
Credit: Dallas Curow