2016: Things are totally gonna work out

Happy 2016! 

Every January, we step forward into another year with hope it will be better. We want to alleviate the thought that nothing ever changes, so we make resolutions. Mine are generally repetitive each turn: be healthier, write more, stress less, travel somewhere new. etc.

2015 was one of my more challenging years. And yet, I feel like I've been saying this for a few calendar flips now.  As a child, no one ever read me a book about a female heroine navigating her late twenties. I did partially learn how to slay (deadbeat) dragons and evil witches though.

Well, this year, instead of making resolutions because I haven't completed half the ones I made last year, I reflect. Below are some of my thoughts for getting through another year. Enjoy! x

Weekly Mantra - The Law of Attraction

I remember reading The Secret a long time ago.

What you think about, you bring about, is the most I recall. Thoughts are powerful. They create our worlds, our moods, and our energy without us even knowing it. I recently bought the book, Law of Attraction: The Science of Attracting More of What You Want and Less of What You Don't by Michael J. Losier. It was a short read, but a good refresher on how the mind is our most powerful tool.

I am an over-thinker. Once I get something in my head, it can spiral into a larger narrative, and suddenly I'm dwelling on something that isn't even real. Being aware of my thoughts, and how they affect my current mood and state is always a lesson that I need reminding of. This week's mantra follows the same guidelines. Enjoy!

"Positive and negative emotions cannot occupy the mind at the same time. One of the other must dominate. It is your responsibility to make sure that positive emotions constitute the dominating influence of your mind." - Napoleon Hill 

Weekly Mantra - Feelings We Can Never Get Back

via Pinterest

This week's mantra comes from author Haruki Murakami, and I found it interesting, especially when January seems to be a month of renewal. Enjoy!

"Lost opportunities, lost possibilities, feelings we can never get back. That’s part of what it means to be alive. But inside our heads – at least that’s where I imagine it – there’s a little room where we store those memories. A room like the stacks in this library. And to understand the workings of our own heart we have to keep on making new reference cards. We have to dust things off every once in awhile, let in fresh air, change the water in the flower vases. In other words, you’ll live forever in your own private library." - Haruki Murakami

Weekly Mantra - Merry Bright Holiday

As the holiday season hits full swing, this week's mantra is all about creating joy. One of my favourite parts of any holiday is handwriting cards, and this J.Crew one was a favourite on my roster.

From mine to yours, happy holidays! x

“The joy of brightening other lives, bearing each others’ burdens, easing others’ loads and supplanting empty hearts and lives with generous gifts becomes for us the magic of the holidays.” - W. C. Jones

Book Club & Weekly Mantra - Wild

On my bedside table is Wild by Cheryl Strayed.

The popular true story follows Strayed's journey as an adventurer who after some tough personal events decides to walk the Pacific Crest Trail alone.

The memoir (which I am more than half way complete) brings you to a point of your own self-discovery. I find myself applauding Strayed's bravery, as I can't even look into a dark forest without  getting shivers. The book has also been adapted into a film starring Reese Witherspoon.

Below is a quote from Wild, and this week's mantra. Enjoy! x

 “I knew that if I allowed fear to overtake me, my journey was doomed. Fear, to a great extent, is born of a story we tell ourselves, and so I chose to tell myself a different story from the one women are told. I decided I was safe. I was strong. I was brave. Nothing could vanquish me.”

― Cheryl Strayed, Wild via Goodreads

image via the great discontent

Weekly Mantra - Freedom vs. Confidence

Confidence seems to be the easy answer to everything.

Magazine editors, actors, models — they all love to tell us that confidence is what makes a person. My favourite beauty site, Into the Gloss and their founder Emily Weiss wrote the following quote this week, and I loved it.

I like her view on being fearless, even if things aren't where they are supposed to be. Enjoy. x

"Freedom and confidence are two different things, in my book. Confidence is overrated—it can be faked, whereas freedom is fearlessness. Freedom is being more or less okay with wherever you’re at, at any given point in your life or your day or your hour, be it really sucky or really great or somewhere in between (and there are a lot of in-betweens.) The single guiding principle that I try to follow, assuming blindly that the rest will fall into place, is to operate squarely in the present. I think it’s one of the most difficult things for anyone to do." 

- Emily Weiss via  via Into the Gloss

The New Vision: Fall

I'm not a very fussy person. 

While I like my space to be (hygienically) clean, I don't mind a bit of clutter. 

I like things strewn around my apartment; I believe it adds character, my character. I let piles of things grow on my desk like moss in a humid forest, until all of a sudden I have no idea why I've kept so many receipts, magazines, and old gift cards. 

While I can deal with clutter, and the organized chaos, sometimes I hit a moment when I have to organize, and rearrange. A few weeks ago, I found myself tearing everything off of my bulletin board. I sat on my carpet and flung off every scrap of paper until I could see the cork again.

It was approaching a new season, and I needed a new vision.

This time, I positioned everything a bit neater than the way I sloppily tacked things on during spring. I found new photos; I gathered new items that were speaking to me. Black and white is the theme; everything is a bit moodier, and more serious.

During summer, I embraced a different kind of me. I was a loosely based version of myself, like reading a book and recognizing someone, but realizing that the name has changed, and maybe the mannerisms, but you can swear you know who they are talking about. The change wasn't bad, it was different. Probably the most different I've felt in years. All summer, I floated around like a large fish that was brought home from the store and had to make decisions based on the size of its tank.

I'm ready to get back to the ocean.

Below is this week's mantra and focuses on the new season. Enjoy!

"That whole time of year, autumn, I find exhilarating. A passionate season. The others are so bland. In the fall, you see opportunities for change. Real change. Possibilities present themselves. None of the renewal and redemption cliches of spring. No. Something darker and more primal and more important than that.” ― Alice LaPlante via Goodreads

Weekly Mantra - Try something different

Sometimes I create change through making small decisions.

Things like buying a new couch pillow; choosing a book genre that I never read, or getting a hair cut. I've mentioned before without getting into too many details, that my routine looks nothing like it did a month ago. These days, I don't have anything in my life quite set. My schedule is made on a weekly basis, and I even work nights. While this change has been significant, I still find myself seeking other ways to alter my surroundings.

I got in touch with Elena, the amazing graphic designer who helped with my blog's redesign last year. I asked if she could send me some of the other logos she made, before I originally picked the final one. She sent me the jpeg, and I immediately changed it. (*Look above! I hope you like it)

Sometimes making a quick change, without focusing on the previous attachment, makes me feel like I'm moving forward in a way. While this blog isn't famous, or read by thousands, it is still a piece of me, and if I'm changing, then this space must also evolve.

For anyone else who's starting over, or contemplating finding a new routine, this week's mantra is for you! x

BRB

This past month has tested my resilience in more ways than I could imagine. There is nothing I need more than a little R&R; a morsel of time away.

Here's to packing a bag, heading to the ocean and shedding a layer with every step.

Below is this week's mantra! Be back soon.

Source: Tumblr

To stay in touch, track Not A Model's travel journey on Instagram. x 

Weekly Mantra - Shonda Rhimes

Credit via Pinterest

I love commencement speeches.

Maybe it's because I will never be 18 again, sitting in an auditorium, looking up to someone who can give me a glimpse into the future.

Commencement speeches do apply to new grads, but when I read them, I once again feel like I have the power to change any direction of my life. The lessons are timeless, and apply to everyone.

My favourite from this year was from TV writer, screenwriter and producer extraordinaire Shonda Rhimes. Rhimes is the brains behind hits like Grey's Anatomy and Scandal, and she owns her own production company. She recently spoke at Dartmouth for their commencement ceremony.

Below is a snippet that I adored. The whole speech is amazing. I encourage you to read it here. Enjoy! x

"Dreams are lovely. But they are just dreams. Fleeting, ephemeral. Pretty. But dreams do not come true just because you dream them. It’s hard work that makes things happen. It’s hard work that creates change.

Lesson One: Ditch the Dream. Be a Do-er, Not a Dreamer.

Maybe you know exactly what you dream of being. Or maybe you’re paralyzed because you have no idea what your passion is. The truth is, it doesn’t matter. You don’t have to know. You just have to keep moving forward. You just have to keep doing something, seizing the next opportunity, staying open to trying something new. It doesn’t have to fit your vision of the perfect job or the perfect life. Perfect is boring and dreams are not real. Just…DO. You think “I wish I could travel” — you sell your crappy car and buy a ticket and go to Bangkok right now. I’m serious. You say “I want to be a writer” — guess what? A writer is someone who writes every day. Start writing. Or: You don’t have a job? Get one. ANY JOB. Don’t sit at home waiting for the magical dream opportunity. Who are you? Prince William? No. Get a job. Work. Do until you can do something else." via Medium

Weekly Mantra + Plant Love

Say aloe to my new roommate! jk.

My latest plant addition obsession is a green, prickly, curvy, aloe plant. (Let's see how long this lives). As this week comes to a close, I also wanted to share a book I'm reading and this week's mantra. I found it at my favourite Chapters location in Toronto, which is shutting down tomorrow. When I went to their closing sale, it looked like the book apocalypse.

Under the piles and piles of leftover books, I found the hardcover version of Susan Sontag: The Complete Rolling Stone Interview. Sontag was an author, intellectual, filmmaker, activist, and professor. Her collection of work spans from novels, to thought-provoking pieces on writing, love, beauty, photography and illness.

This book features her full interview with journalist Jonathan Cott. While reading, I came across this quote and thought it would be a good mantra. See below. 

"Look, what I want is to be fully present in my life -- to really be where you are, contemporary with yourself in your life, giving full attention to the world, which includes you. You are not the world, the world is not identical to you, but you're in it and paying attention it." 

For more on Susan Sontag, check out Brain Pickings' collection of her work. Happy Friday! x

New Weekly Mantra - Spread Love

It's (almost) the end of a short week for Canadians, and the beginning of a long weekend for Americans gearing up for Memorial Day. I don't know about you, but this week feels like it's quite long despite the lost day.

Below is an (end) of the week mantra and it comes from The Chalkboard Mag, an online wellness magazine from the founders of Pressed Juicery. I read it daily, and it provides tips on all areas of health; from recipes, to chats with yoga instructors, doctors and celebrities. Below is a quote I found on their Instagram and it is a great life reminder. Enjoy! x

New Weekly Mantra - No Happy Ending

Grabbing my phone first thing in the morning, and scrolling through feeds of information is one way I wake up. The other, is reaching for a book.

I love mini books as they don't require an extensive time commitment. They can be shoved in a purse, and opened at random to provide wisdom, in the middle of the day. 

Lately, I keep my pocket book of Pema Chödrön on my night table. Chödrön is an American Buddhist nun and bestselling author whose teachings focuses on developing patience and kindness; while breaking old patterns, and unlocking joy. Each page takes under a minute to read, and has a different heading like, 'The noble heart,' or 'Right here is a good place to start.'

This week's mantra comes from Chödrön's pocket book in the chapter, "No happy ending." Enjoy!

"In one of the first teachings I ever heard, the teacher said, "I don't know why you came here, but I want to tell you right now that the basis of this whole teaching is that you're never going to get everything together." I felt a little like he had just slapped me in the face or thrown cold water over my head. But I've always remembered it. He said, "You're never going to get it all together." There isn't going to be some precious future time when all the loose ends will be tied up. Even though it was shocking to me, it rang true. One of the things that keeps us unhappy is this continual searching for pleasure or security, searching for a little more comfortable situation, either at the domestic level or at the spiritual level or at the level of mental peace."

Weekly Mantra - Get a life

This week's mantra comes from author Anna Quindlen and her book, A Short Guide to a Happy Life. I found this quote on one of my favourite sites, Brain Pickings, and it has inspired me to pick up a copy of my own.

I won't go into too much detail because Quindlen summarizes her thoughts so well. It's a long one this week. Enjoy!

"So I suppose the best piece of advice I could give anyone is pretty simple: get a life. A real life, not a manic pursuit of the next promotion, the bigger paycheck, the larger house. Do you think you’d care so very much about those things if you developed an aneurysm one afternoon, or found a lump in your breast while in the shower?

Get a life in which you notice the smell of salt water pushing itself on a breeze over the dunes, a life in which you stop and watch how a red-tailed hawk circles over a pond and a stand of pines. Get a life in which you pay attention to the baby as she scowls with concentration when she tries to pick up a Cheerio with her thumb and first finger.

Turn off your cell phone. Turn off your regular phone, for that matter. Keep still. Be present.

Get a life in which you are not alone. Find people you love, and who love you. And remember that love is not leisure, it is work." 
- Anna Quindlen via Brain Pickings

Weekly Mantra - Your assumptions...

This week's mantra comes from one of my favourite sites, Brain Pickings. The quote below was pulled from an anonymous advice column called Dear Sugar. The column was later published into a book. Interesting fact: the anonymous author is actually Cheryl Strayed of the bestselling novel Wild.

Below is a snippet I found rather interesting. For the full advice, click here.

"Your assumptions about the lives of others are in direct relation to your naïve pomposity. Many people you believe to be rich are not rich. Many people you think have it easy worked hard for what they got. Many people who seem to be gliding right along have suffered and are suffering. Many people who appear to you to be old and stupidly saddled down with kids and cars and houses were once every bit as hip and pompous as you." - Cheryl Strayed via Brain Pickings

The Advice Read - Stephen King

When I picked up Stephen King's "On Writing" I wasn't necessarily sold that I would find the advice I was looking for.

First, this book wasn't in the self-help section.
Second, I've never read a Stephen King novel.

"On Writing" is half-memoir, half writing advice. King has written over 150 short stories, and over 50 books, so his reputation is sound. Once I began reading, I became a hooked student, sitting at the imaginary front of the class, absorbing as much as I could.

His writing advice is simple, such as: write 1000 words a day even if you're not inspired; always use "said" when writing dialogue, the rest if fluff. And while I tried to write 1000 words a day (and got pretty far) I've now fallen off that wagon, and have set a new goal of just writing something every day.
I found most of his advice On Writing, so valuable that I started sharing with anyone who would listen.

While this book may be more beneficial for people who are looking to improve their craft, the first half is about King's childhood and journey to becoming a writer. The quote I chose to highlight from the book can apply to all areas of life, even if you're not about to write a novel. Enjoy! x

"The scariest moment is always just before you start. After that, things can only get better." 

Weekly Mantra - Jennifer Lawrence

[image via GQ] 

As if anyone needed another reason to love Jennifer Lawrence. 

Lawrence, everyone's (and no one's) sweetheart, spoke up during a chat with Yahoo's Marissa Mayer. During the interview she received a question from a father who spoke on behalf of his daughter who wanted to know how Jennifer deals with pressure from the media to look a certain way, maintain a certain body.

Lawrence's response was honest and not just what a publicist would want her to say. She also slammed my least favourite show in the universe.

Because of her bravado, and belief in reality, she is this week's mantra. Enjoy!

"[S]hows like the Fashion Police . . . put values in all the things that are wrong and [say] that it’s okay to point at people and call them ugly and call them fat and they call it “fun” and “welcome to the real world.” And it’s like, that shouldn’t be the real world. That’s going to keep being the real world if you keep it that way. It’s not until we stop treating each other like that and just stop calling each other fat . . . with these unrealistic expectations for women. It’s disappointing that the media keeps it alive and fuels that fire." - Jennifer Lawrence (via Man Repeller)

New Weekly Mantra - Take Care

Last week I was at dinner with a friend who had just got a manicure.

We both remarked on how getting our nails done somehow make us feel better, more competent. While I agreed, I still don't get mine done often. As someone who writes and types all day, sometimes freshly painted nails can feel like the equivalent of having the rest of my life together.

Lately, the more I read about "self-care" or in a more new-age way, the idea of truly liking yourself, the more I realize it affects every aspect of life. Things like: taking care of your health, getting a massage, taking the time to sit and read, or getting a hair cut, all make a difference. When you feel or look good, you may be kinder to yourself.

Sometimes you have to indulge. When I find myself neglecting the "extras" it's usually because I've become too busy or preoccupied in other areas of my life. On my most recent day off, I decided to get a manicure and pedicure and get my hair blown out. Spending most of my day being primped and prodded probably wasn't the best use of my time, but once everything was complete, I felt like a new person.

Below is this week's weekly mantra, and it comes from Buddha. Enjoy! x

"You can search throughout the entire universe for someone who is more deserving of your love and affection than you are yourself, and that person is not to be found anywhere. You yourself, as much as anybody in the entire universe deserve your love and affection." Buddha

New Weekly Mantra - Nothing Is Stopping You

You know who doesn't have a self-esteem problem? Big Sean.

Well, I could safely say that most rappers have an extreme sense of confidence. They are always spitting rhymes of how great they are, or rather, how much better they are than their counterparts.

Currently, I've been listening to Big Sean's album Hall of Fame. On his main track, "Nothing is Stopping You," he rhymes his usual bravado. However, at the end of the song his mother (or what seems to be his mother) starts talking over the beat. She says,

"I know you're not my child talking like that. Focus on shifting the negative energy, into something positive and the easiest way to do that, is to be grateful for all the things that you do have. For your health, for your family, your friends, all the people that care about you. You've got food to eat, you've got a place to stay." 

Cool right? Honest right? And so, it's this week's mantra.

If you don't feel good, go with the gratitude. Get happiness through appreciation. Perhaps even listen to a rap song, or maybe just call your mother. She'll set you straight.

New Weekly Mantra - September

September is my favourite month.

Beyond any other time of year, this month signifies something new. When January rolls around and we're supposed to make our resolutions for the calendar year, I can't help but feel forced. When September rolls around, I naturally start thinking about change and growth and the possibilities that lie ahead. 

I call this the "Back to School" effect. After years upon years of planning a "back to school" outfit, and opening up a fresh page of an academic notebook, I still get those phantom feelings without going back to a classroom.

September reminds us of that soon we will be heading in the months of family gatherings, added layers and a slight recluse into the home.  Summer is all about relaxation or vacation, whereas fall brings with it structure and reflection. It's not always the easiest time of year, but it's my favourite. 

This week's mantra is all about the next season ahead. Enjoy! x

"The foliage has been losing its freshness through the month of August, and here and there a yellow leaf shows itself like the first grey hair amidst the locks of a beauty who has seen one season too many." - Oliver Wendell Holmes